SO YOU THINK YOU'RE IN LOVE?

This past weekend I was privileged to marry my third son Benjamin and his beautiful bride, Adrienne. As with many of the other couples I’ve counseled before, I asked them the same question as the others. “Do you love this man/woman?” “Oh yes, I really do!” I follow up with the next question. “What do you mean when you say, ‘I love you!’ ”

The response usually goes something like this. “Oh she makes me feel so good.” “He makes me laugh and is always fun to be with” “I want to spend the rest of my life with her.” “He makes me feel safe and secure.” My response is “That sounds just like a relationship with a Puppy! Puppies make you feel good. They make you laugh and are always a good source of entertainment. As they grow they are able to make you feel safe and secure.

My next question goes like this. “What is Love?” Not one person has come up with an adequate answer. The best answer is to be found in The Manufacturer’s Handbook in 1 Corinthians 13. I am attaching the Amplified Version translation, because I think it really captures the essence of what real love is. I challenge you to read it slowly and meditate on each facet of what real love is.

First I want you to spend time alone with God and ask Him to show you how you rate on a 1-10 scale with a “10” being like the very Love of God. I must warn you, it won’t be very pretty.

Next spend time with your loved one and ask them to evaluate you. Evaluate each other, so you can get a real time picture of how your love life really is. When you are able to arrive at a conclusion to the areas of your life which need adjustment, pray for Divine enablement, and a Divine Strategy. Then begin to work together with your loved one in the direction of real love.

This may be a somewhat painful exercise initially, but when you eventually not only say that “I love you!,” but walk the talk as well, then you are on your way to an experience in your life where Heaven touches earth. Here we go. When I first took this test, I never got past the first one..."Love is Patient...."

1) LOVE IS PATIENT--it is slow to lose patience, does not demonstrate irritations, or reflect anger, or have a quick temper.

2} IS KIND--looks for ways of being constructive. It discovers successful methods of improving or contributing to the spouses life.

3} DOES NOT ENVY--it is not possessive; it does not hold exclusive control where

your partner is allowed little or no freedom to fulfill himself in what God has for him.

4} DOES NOT VAUNT ITSELF--it is not anxious to impress; does not seek to make

an impression or create an image for personal gain.

5} IS NOT PUFFED UP--it does not cherish inflated ideas of its own importance;

it is not self-centered; it does not allow or expect life to revolve around itself.

6} DOES NOT BEHAVE UNSEEMLY-- knows what is proper and when.

7} DOES NOT SEEK ITS OWN--it does not pursue selfish advantage; but has concern for

the needs of your spouse and the families involved.

8} IS NOT EASILY PROVOKED--it is not touchy, hypersensitive, or easily hurt;

does not take things too personally.

9}THINKS NO EVIL--it does not keep account of evil; does not review wrongs

which have been forgiven; does not dwell on past evil; destroys evidence of past

mistakes when possible.

l0} DOES NOT REJOICE IN INIQUITY--does not use other’s evil to excuse personal weakness.

11} REJOICES IN THE TRUTH-- is in active fellowship with dedicated Christians; is occupied with spiritual objectives.

12} BEARS ALL THINGS--it knows no limit to its forbearance; has the ability to live with the inconsistencies of others.

13} BELIEVES ALL THINGS--it knows no end to its trust; you believe in your

spouse and your spouse’s worth without question. It has not reason to doubt the

person’s integrity.

14} HOPES ALL THINGS--it knows no fading of its hope for your relationship; it has

perfect peace and confidence in God.

15} ENDURES ALL THINGS--it has unlimited endurance; it is able to outlast anything;

it is able to endure all obstacles and even love in the face of unreturned love.

LOVE NEVER FAILS!

You can walk in love the way God designed it, or just continue on and waste your precious moments on this earth in complete frustration.